FATE justifies what reason cannot.
Back in 2008, I remember entering UST with a heavy heart—not that I despised being a Thomasian, but because I was still too absorbed with my past. I felt quite disillusioned with the sudden shift in my world—as if being forced to swallow something that my juvenile mind had yet to comprehend.
Adjusting took quite some time and for months, I felt like an ant walking along a sea of giants. Everything around me seemed imaginary.
But as months passed, I regained my composure. It was not an easy process, but I developed a firmer grip of myself.
Little by little, I became accustomed to the mores of Thomasian culture, making me realize that fate has a reason for everything that happens. It justifies what reason cannot and even proves that better things are to be laid out for us if we only know how to wait.
Four years later, I still enter this same institution with a heavy heart, but now because of a new dilemma—not knowing how to let go of the present.
As of this writing, 10 days are left prior to my graduation. Think of a C-4 explosive that only has 10 seconds prior to its detonation, or even a 10-second sudden death round for a head-to-head basketball game—that is how it exactly feels, making every minute of my stay as an undergraduate student count.
Months from now, it is certain that I would be forced to leave the confines of this institution. The fleeting nature of everyday has always been an inevitable phase of every journey, and part of the solution to cope with it is to embrace the situation with much desire regardless of how difficult it is to walk away from the things one has been accustomed to.
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Spending two and a half years working for the Varsitarian was indeed—just like how most “Amihans” (‘V’ alumni) would say—both a gift and a curse.
Luck may have worked its way on me as I was blessed to qualify in this publication, more so to be part of its Quadricentennial and Neo-centennial batches. Needless to say, it is a gift that gave me the much-needed opportunities every journalism student would wish to have: Hands-on application of journalism and connections to well-known Filipino journalists and literary writers, adding the crash course on events planning and character-building it offers.
But, personally, the Varsitarian has become more of a burden for me because of the sacrifices I was forced to make for its sake.
There came instances when I intentionally hid from my superiors or even despised having to drop by the office to deal with unfinished works. This pushed me to perceive it as a hindrance in enjoying an average student life.
Despite this publication’s Janus-faced identity, I never had the courage to walk away from it. I thought of quitting a number of times, but never did I translate such thoughts into actions. Perhaps the decision to stay until the end was brought by my personal fear to let go of something that has been part of my day-to-day endeavor. I thought of losing it as a great loss, and even perceived resigning from it as a grave form of cowardice.
I brought this perception with me as long as I could and fortunately, it made me last until the end.
To my Varsitarian family, I regret not being able to exert my best efforts during my incumbency. I hope and I believe that you understand how I prioritized my affiliations. Thank you very much for the sea of opportunities you gave me.
To my Features babies—Erika, Meg, and Lui—despite lapses in our performance, I always feel blessed for having you as my team. To Lui, I apologize for not being able to train you well. May you make the light of our section burn even brighter by inspiring more readers through the stories you will write.
To the Varsitarian triumvirate—Sir Lito, Sir Ipe, and Sir Ian—I could not thank you more for trusting in my abilities. Everything I need to learn about journalism, I practically learned during my stint at the ‘V’ with you as my silent mentors.
To the members of the Flame, my patience and limitation as a leader were put to the test during my stint as editor in chief. I learned practical lessons that made me realize how delusional this world is for always banking on what is ideal. Thank you for the fun, laughter, and lifetime lessons I will always carry with me.
To Ate Rose-An, my predecessor in almost all of my affiliations, I was reluctant at first to accept the responsibilities you have entrusted me. Thank you for believing in me even if I barely believed on my potentials.
To Journalism4, nothing beats the feeling of having fun while studying. Thank you for being the best class I ever knew. The differences we shared made our four-year journey unique, perhaps even incomparable and unforgettable.
To all my college friends, especially Jhiz and Eli, our friendship does not end the moment we march up the stage to get our diplomas. Our nights of booze and party will continue until we lie on our deathbeds. Thank you for being my loyal companions in my college journey.
To the people who never left me despite my stubbornness—Papa, Mama, and Kuya—I would never have survived college without you. Thank you for your undying love, care, and support, even at times when I fail to appreciate your efforts. I love you more than anything else in the world.
Finally, to the One who has witnessed all of my struggles, thank you for sustaining me during my weakest points. I would like to believe that it was your intervention that caused the many surprises in my college journey. Now I understand why I ended up being a Thomasian.
I feel relieved for having been able to share my sentiments through this column space. Catharsis has been served. Now it is time to take a step further.
