ROND DE JAMBE (rohn dih ZHAnB) – “circle/circling of the leg;” a movement in which the working leg is made to describe a letter D. Both legs must be kept perfectly straight and all movement must come from the hip, along with the arching and relaxing of the instep. This is an exercise for good turn-outs of the legs and feet.

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Some of the “unbundled” charges in your Meralco bills, ladies and gentlemen. Incidentally, the word “charge” also means “attack.” Enjoy.

Transmission charge. The consumers pay for the delivery of electricity from Meralco’s generators from remote areas or provinces to the “distribution system” of Meralco. Like the Generation charge, it also goes to the National Power Corporation, whose owners should have been filthy rich by now.

Distribution charge. Practically the same with the Transmission charge, only that it is itemized as the “building, operating, and maintaining the distribution system for its end-users.” The person who made the write-up must have memorized the Thesaurus by heart.

System Loss charge. Meralco seems to be blaming us for the stolen electricity THEY are supposed to be guarding, and what the Distribution charge was for. They even coupled it with some law mumbo jumbo. There ought to be a law about blaspheming against the law. The penalty should be electrocution.

Franchise Tax. I thought the tax was intended for the company; not its consumers. Otherwise, it should be pointless and an embarrassment to the law’s author, who should, by now, lobby for the legalization of hara-kiri in the Philippines.

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Universal charges (after Local and National charges). Defined as a “nonpassable charge” in accordance with another law. Sign me up for the lighting of the Black Hole so Meralco can see its way inside.

Missionary electrification. A kind of Universal charge. Makes sense. The Filipino missionaries in Iraq need all the help they can get.

Environmental charge. Another kind of Universal charge. Meralco must be a member of the Save the Earth Club in our subdivison when I was four.

Lifeline Discount/Lifeline subsidy. In effect, we’re supposed to be paying each other’s Lifeline discount here, so I don’t think it’s my final answer.

Interclass subsidy. The caste system went this far?

If you have nothing better to do, visit: http:www.meralco.com.ph/customer/rc main01.html.

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Recently, one of my teachers told a female irregular student in our class that she’d better join another group instead of the one she is already in, because, as the professor puts it, “’yung mga iyan pumapasok lang para sabihing pumapasok sila at nagpapas ng assignment.”

Woah. A mind reader. Barely three days with a class of 40 and the teacher is able to discern the minds of a particular group in class—majority of which, while outwardly looking crass and Neanderthal-like, presently dominate the creative writing scene in the University and are geniuses in their own right.

I didn’t know teachers were licensed to be openly prejudiced against their students. I thought everybody silently agreed that we either keep our prejudices to ourselves, or tell it to somebody who cannot relate to what we’re saying. But what the hey.

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These teachers—whom our parents have so generously paid for so we can learn something worthwhile besides the sit-in-front-and-look-absolutely-unmotivating lesson—do have their privileges.

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